She is Sick & Tired…

She is sick and tired of attracting guys
who don’t understand her worth.
The kind who fill her heart up with empty lies
Because all they really want is to get up her skirt.

She is sick and tired of dealing with men
who expect her to be their mother.
Want her to cook, clean and buy him nice things
Just so that he can move on to another sucker.

She is sick and tired of men who claim to love her
As he undresses her with his eyes.
Guys who tell her what he thinks she wants to hear
So he can get in between her thighs.

She is sick and tired of meeting guys
Who have nothing to offer but hidden agendas.
They pretend to care just to win her trust
Then switch up faster than them lies could hit you.

She is sick and tired of the lying and cheating
Are most men really this full of games?
If you don’t want her, then just move around
Because the lies you tell are super lame.

She is sick and tired of you manipulative niggas
The kind who play mind games for a living.
Have her questioning herself, acting like you are the victim
Because you are a master at the art of deception.

She is sick and tired of accepting less than she deserves
Because they say her requirements are unreasonable.
Tryna give you unqualified niggas a chance
She lost faith in ever finding a real one.

© 2019 | @MsToyaMichelle

Why I Walk by Faith, and Not by Sight

I am not a Golden State Warriors fan, but I know that as a fan it sucks to hear the commentator say, ” Curry dribbles…Curry shoots…Curry scor…MISSES…very badly.”

Now, I don’t know about him being the best shooter on the planet, but I felt a soft spot in my heart for probably one of the best shooters in the history of the NBA, Steph Curry, when I recently learned that he suffers from Keratoconus. Curry has admitted to suffering from vision problems during his entire career, and squinting had become the norm for him. But it wasn’t until he fell into a recent shooting slump that he felt the need to get help. That is when he found out that he had been living with the disease for years. According to a Twitter post made by the Bleacher Report on April 3, 2019, “Steph Curry broke out of a recent sub-37% 3PT shooting slump by putting on contact lenses to fix eye issues he’s had his whole career.” So yes….that means he was breaking 3-point records and wasn’t even able to see the rim clearly.

For as long as I can remember, I have always had perfect vision. Whether an image was near or far, I had no problem seeing clearly. It wasn’t until one random day back in 2009 while walking the grounds of my former college, Texas A&M University, that I realized that I couldn’t make out the faces of people from afar without squinting. I would get really bad headaches, but would attribute it to the late nights I spent studying. It didn’t bother me too much because my overall vision was still pretty decent.

Upon graduating from college, I noticed a dramatic decline in my visual acuity which prompted me to seek the help of a professional. Literally, one day I was able to see, then the next moment I was in dire need of corrective lenses and no one seemed to be able to help me. Three optometrists later and three failed attempts at fitting me for a pair of glasses, I was finally referred to an ophthalmologist who diagnosed me with the progressive eye disease, Keratoconus. Keratoconus causes the cornea of a diseased eye to bulge out like a cone instead of being perfectly round. The cone-shaped cornea causes my vision to be very distorted. Oftentimes, my vision consists of halos and ghost images, and my prescription changes very frequently. Having poor vision was new to me so the struggle was very real in the first couple of years of the diagnoses. There were many days that I broke down into tears because I felt trapped inside of my own body. Imprisoned by eyes.

Because eye glasses are not able to correct the abnormally shaped cornea of a Keratoconus patient, I was eventually fitted for a pair of Rigid Gas Permeable (RGP) contact lenses back in 2011. The cost was a whopping $400 per pair! Aside from being pricey and occasionally getting stuck underneath my eyelids, these lenses were my only solution at the time.

Fast forward to the year 2017, I learned that the RGP lenses were not the best for my vision, and that they had caused scarring on my left cornea… further blurring my vision. I was finally placed in Scleral lenses that I have been wearing for 2 years now.

My vision isn’t 20/20, but I am so grateful to God that I have been able to obtain nearly perfect vision rather than none at all with the help of my sclerals. Although I didn’t understand why my vision had changed so suddenly, or why it was happening to me, I have always trusted God during the process. My natural eyes were deteriorating everyday, but my spiritual eyes remained on the lesson that God had for me. I walk by faith because Lord knows my sight would lead me in all sorts of wrong directions.

Consistency: The Difference between Success and Failure

Up until today, I have been consistently inconsistent. Why? Probably because I didn’t experience the kind of success that I wanted fast enough. Or maybe because I always seem to convince myself that I will fail before I even begin. I would start a project but never finish, and quit a work out plan after putting in 2 whole days of hard work. I have been putting off attending Grad school for at least 8 years now because–well…because of absolutely no reason at all. I guess it’s just easier to give up when things seem to be a tad bit too difficult.

I love Dewayne “The Rock” Johnson for several reasons. Lawd, have mercy…that is a fine piece of man! Okay but seriously…He’s known as the #BrahmaBull and People’s Champ to WWE fans, but today he is my champion because he couldn’t have said the following words any better: “Success isn’t always about greatness, It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.”

Everyone wasn’t born great and success doesn’t just happen because you’re just that good. It is a process and being consistent is a crucial part of the process. Think about a guy who pursues a woman. She is not going to fall head over heels for him simply because of his looks or his words. This guy has to prove his love for her by being consistent with having those same words match his daily actions.

It’s so easy to complain about how hard the task is instead of “just do[ing] it” in the words of #Nike. But let’s remember that if you really want to do something, you will find a way–and if not, you will find an excuse.

Consistence is the difference between success and failure. Therefore, I am challenging you as well as myself to quit stopping short of the finish line. Focus on being better tomorrow than you were today by working hard every day to stay the course. Be consistent in the gym…consistent at the hobby you picked up this year… Consistent in your relationship…consistent with your children. Consistency shows that we truly value that “thing” that we are working hard at each day, and the end result will be SUCCESS!